See, it’s easy to say online for me. Even though there’s an infinite amount of space on the web and this blog has a chance to last longer than any printed article I have ever written, I still feel more comfortable making this statement here.
This is the time where I’m now supposed to say, “I don’t really hate turkeys. Actually, I love turkeys…” but I’m not going to cheapen this entry by lying to you. I do. I sincerely despise these birds for everything they represent. Their evasive abilities, their keen eyesight, their bravado…their lack of intelligence when trying to peck at a window at their own reflection, their lack of intellect when trying to spur a turkey decoy to death, and their frequent inability to get out of the way of passing cars on country gravel roads.
I hate them because they outsmart me repeatedly and because they cause me to lose sleep from opening until closing day. But I’m going to have a hard time writing this in NEBRASKAland. I want to write it, I do, but anytime the word “hate” is used it most often is linked to something negative. Understandably so, but I can’t think of another word that describes what I think about when I think about turkeys.
I know I’m not alone. I know that multiple turkey hunters who either think this or say it on a frequent basis, but I’m still having a hard time trying to get this message across to readers of the magazine without coming off like some 21st Century, “if it flies it dies” hunter. For me, it’s different than that. I know there’s a respect there, but I can’t stop thinking about how many times I’ve been dooped by a turkey while afield.
But when writers write about conservation, including hunting and fishing, “hate” is the wrong word to use. I get that. Which makes this writing assignment even tougher for me because I also want this piece to be true. But I hope I can figure it out soon. Carroll wants to see a draft in a couple of weeks on the turkey hunting essay that I am currently trying to write. We’ll see how it works out.
For it’s 10:15 on a Monday night and I’m trying to work on this essay right now, but I can’t get out of my own way with the writing.
So much for sleeping tonight.